How many times have we heard someone say (or that we've said), "Oh, that's just the way that I am." We usually say that when trying to explain behaviors that are not productive (or some would say annoying).
Marshall Goldsmith, blogging for Harvard Business Publishing, asks the question, "Do You Have an Excessive Need to Be Yourself?" The post can be found here.
Goldsmith's analysis, and questioning that he provided to a CEO, are terrific for mediators and ADR professionals. Part of our goal, in my opinion, is to help lead people from one place to another. This often means candid and uncomfortable conversations. But those conversations are necessary.
So the next time that we say, "Oh, that's just the way that I am," let's ask ourselves not only why are we that way, but also, what effect does our behavior have on other people? What effect do we have on people by focusing on ME instead of THEM?
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